The Evil Dead (1981)

Tagline: “The ultimate experience in gruelling terror’”
Duration: 85 minutes

Film Quality: 3.5/5
Gore Content: 4/5
Entertainment Value: 4.5/5
Originality: 4/5

Introduction

When two teenage lads decided to venture into the woods, full of hope and dreams, they surely didn’t expect that kind of reaction. No, not Dale and Tucker, I’m talking about Raimi and Campbell. Having begged, borrowed and probably attained by other means, enough money to make a feature length version of their short ‘Within the Woods’, a small crew of some 13 (they really didn’t help themselves did they!!!) began pre-production on a low budget film about demonic possession that within a couple of years had secured distribution with New Line cinema and a ringing endorsement from Stephen King. Campbell and Raimi had arrived…in style!

In a nutshell

Five teens venture into the woods where they unearth a tape recorder in an old log cabin. Foolishly they play the tape and unleash a demonic force that possesses them one by one. Can they unravel the mystery of the Book of the Dead and defeat the evil?

So what’s good about it?

This a true success story and a sheer triumph of creativity that goes to show that money and marketing are not the driving forces of creativity and entertainment. Raimi and Campbell were friends from school and it was through stubbornness and an absolute desire to get this film done that the horror community was given a genuinely original and fun film. They had just $100,000 and, though you could argue that they were lucky to have a friend with connections at Cannes to give them a wider audience, it was no fluke that Stephen King publicly endorsed the film. It really is a ferociously original film!

Let’s start with Raimi’s wonderful camerawork. The shape and form of the demonic force is never shown but its presence is everywhere, largely through Raimi’s expert handling of the lens. Just watch the scene where Cheryl comes out of the cabin and she looks to her left and right. The camera never lets you see past her field of view, she is on display and we are the ones watching her along with the evil presence. It’s unnerving and there are many other scenes like that in the woods, in the cabin, long tracking shots and the now infamous camera through the woods shot at the end. There is a sequence about an hour in where almost everything is shot at an angle of 45 degrees that is astonishing and shows a talent and capacity for editing way beyond what you normally expect from a low budget gore fest.

Raimi clearly knows his horror as the film works on two levels. The first half is surprisingly frightening, working more as a haunted house movie with strange noises, something in the cellar, temporary possession and an omnipotent force keeping the quintet at the cabin. There is some very creepy sound work going on here, particularly in the moments leading up to the infamous ‘tree rape’ scene and Shelly’s gruesome and very noisy demise. Those looking for a gorefest may be disappointed by the opening 40 minutes but as soon as Cheryl ‘turns’ there is more than enough splatter and gooey gore thrown at the screen. We’re treated to eye gougings, flesh eating, decapitation by axe, head loppings and a very painful moment involving an ankle and pencil (which is mightier than the sword?).

But who’d have thought that the breakout star would by Bruce Campbell’s ‘Ash’ who, certainly for the first half of the film does nothing special. In fact for most of the second half he struggles underneath book shelves or standing around not knowing what to do and Raimi seems to delight in throwing blood at him in various parts of the movie. In truth it’s the film’s superior, albeit more goofy, sequel where Raimi goes ‘Full Campbell’ and really cuts his childhood friend loose in his now trademark madcap style. However it’s this film that gave the pair their big break in a partnership that’s still giving us horror fans so much pleasure today, both in and outside the ‘Evil Dead’ universe.

What about the bad?

One of the reasons Sam Raimi made ‘Evil Dead 2’ so jovial was because of the reaction he got from some quarters to what was a fairly brutal original. Despite a thick undercurrent of black humour running throughout the film, the ‘tree rape’ scene never sat well with some critics and it does appear a little out of place with some of the other demonic attacks. I’m sure it wasn’t Raimi’s intention to trivialise rape or make it appear a little hokey but, despite it not being particularly graphic, it is pretty tasteless. With the rest of the film being such good, occasionally over the top fun I don’t think the film would have been any the worse without it.

Raimi would go on to write and direct bigger and better films and there are some elements of ‘The Evil Dead’ that don’t stand up too well to modern audiences. It has been surpassed by its own superior sequel and, despite some nifty camerawork and useful effects, it is rough around the edges and shows all the hallmarks of a low budget, amateur, independent film, albeit done VERY well and hugely enjoyable!

Any themes?

I always found it interesting that it was the women in the film who become possessed first. Could this be a heavily disguised feminist film? Okay, perhaps that’s a stretch too far but it does raise the question about whether our female characters are in fact the victims here. Traditionally it’s been the female characters who are terrorised, become the focus for our fear and the ones we identify with but not here. By making the ladies succumb to the demonic possession first, it is the males who are terrorised and the women who become the tormentors, albeit with a forced hand. This is certainly more pronounced in the second half of the film with Ash in particular bearing the brunt of the beatings.

By switching the roles and focus of the terror, it’s worth pointing out that this film was made during the height of the slasher boom. The way the film is structured is almost like an anti-slasher. You have the correct setting, a cabin in the woods becomes the terrible place, you have the female character who can ‘see’, many of the gruesome scenes involve sharp, penetrative weapons, guns are useless and there is an unseen, omnipresent force stalking the group of teens. However it is all subverted. The final girl is a boy, it is the men who are stalked and slashed, it’s the women who keep getting up after seemingly being killed and there is no unmasking, no resolution, no real escape.

Release History

Despite ‘The Evil Dead’ becoming intrinsically linked to the video nasties moral panic, it’s worth pointing out that Raimi’s film was never on the official list, or at least not the prosecuted 39 that made the DPP’s list. The original cinema version in the UK was cut by around 45 seconds and it was this version that was released by Palace on VHS and later banned in 1983, being dropped from the list in 1985. Palace picked it up again for distribution in 1990 but the BBFC failed to see the funny side, slicing a further minute from the running time. Anchor Bay brought out the full uncut VHS and DVD in 2001 and all subsequent releases have been completely uncensored.

There is a ‘Book of the Dead’ edition released in the UK which is cropped to fit a widescreen ratio rather than its natural fullscreen display. Some fans dislike this particular version as it is also slightly altered, albeit at Raimi’s request, including the removal of a lightening flash and a zoom into Cheryl’s face as she turns around having been possessed.

It’s worth pointing out that some of the newspapers that campaigned for this film to be banned (yes, I’m talking to you ‘The Sun’) were quite happy to give it away free on DVD in its uncut form as a promotion in the early 2000s to sell copies…hypocritical doesn’t quite cover it!

Cultural Impact

Massive and matches ‘The Texas Chain Saw Massacre’ and ‘Night of the Living Dead’ as one of the most culturally significant horror debuts in cinema history. It’s spawned two sequels that progressively upped the humour and slapstick whilst reducing the horror and gore, a very good remake and a TV series that continued a number of years after his own third movie ended.

It gave the world a unique directorial talent in Sam Raimi who became one of the hottest properties in Hollywood when he took a stab at the ‘Spider-man’ movies, doing a superb job on the first two, It’s refreshing to see a director who cut his teeth on the horror circuit not abandoning his own directorial traits and you could argue that his witty style and eye for the unusual camera shot was perfectly suited to bringing comic book characters to life.

And no dissection of the cultural impact of ‘The Evil Dead’ would be complete without talking about the living legend that is Bruce Campbell. There’s something reassuring about an actor like Campbell fully embracing his B-movie pedigree and breakout character persona. He’s given wonderful turns in ‘My Name is Bruce’ and ‘Bubba Ho-Tep’ with gleeful endeavour and didn’t hesitate, in fact seemingly actively pursued a return to the character of Ash for ‘Ash Vs Evil Dead’, a superb continuation of Raimi’s universe. Long may it continue!

Final thoughts

Original, entertaining, gleefully gory and revelling in its own bad taste, it’s very difficult not to enjoy ‘The Evil Dead’. It’s title suggests a zombie movie but it plays out more like a haunted house movie with a touch of the slasher and large dollop of demonic possession. Highly original, it was quite a hit on its release, raking in well over $2.5m and was the year’s biggest selling video in the UK before the BBFC put paid to that! It’s a film to go back to and enjoy over and over again, just enjoy it!

Memorable quotes

Linda: “We’re gonna get you, we’re gonna get you, not another peep, time to go to sleep.”

Evil Dead: “Join us…”

Shelly: “I don’t know what I would have done had I remained on those hot coals, burning my pretty flesh.”

Cheryl: “You will die…like the others before you, one by one we will take you.”

Ash: “You bastards, why are you torturing me like this…why?”

You’ll like this if you enjoyed…

‘The Texas Chain Saw Massacre’, ‘The Video Dead’, ‘Bad Taste’, ‘Cabin in the Woods’.

Related Posts

‘Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn’ – Click here
‘Bad Taste’ – Click here
‘The Texas Chain Saw Massacre’ – Click here
‘The Video Dead’ – Click here
‘An American Werewolf in London’ – Click here
'Braindead' - Click here

The DPP 39: Video Nasties List - Part 9

In 1984, the Video Recordings Act ushered in a terrifying new era in UK home video entertainment. The regulation and subsequent censorship of home videos by the British Board of Film Classification led to a number of films being seized by the authorities and prosecuted under the Obscene Publications Act 1959. In total, 39 of these films were successfully prosecuted, over the coming months The Horror Video will look very briefly at the release history of each film and its current status. To view the rest of the series…

Part 1: ‘Absurd’, ‘Anthropophagus’ and ‘Axe’, click here
Part 2: ‘Bay of Blood’, ‘The Beast in Heat’ and ‘Blood Feast’, click here
Part 3: ‘Blood Rites’, ‘Bloody Moon’ and ‘The Burning’, click here
Part 4: ‘Cannibal Apocalypse’, ‘Cannibal Ferox’ and ‘Cannibal Holocaust’, click here
Part 5: ‘The Cannibal Man’, ‘The Devil Hunter’ and ‘Don’t Go in the Woods’ click here
Part 6: ‘The Driller Killer’, ‘Evilspeak’ and ‘Expose’. Click here
Part 7: ‘Faces of Death’, ‘Fight for Your Life’, ‘Flesh for Frankenstein’, click here
Part 8: ‘Forest of Fear’, ‘The Gestapo’s Last Orgy’ and ‘The House by the Cemetery’, click here

Title: ‘House on the Edge of the Park’ (1980)

Director: Ruggero Deodato
Uncut running time: 91 minutes
Alternative titles: ‘La Casa Speruta Nel Parco’, ‘La Casa al Confini del Parco’, ‘Der Schlitzer’

Deodato certainly knows how to cheese off the censors, this is another fairly graphic and controversial film featuring rape, torture and extreme violence. Even Deodato himself thought that the script was too violent (this was the man who made ‘Cannibal Holocaust’!) and it was perhaps inevitable that it’d end up on the UK banned list.

Essentially it’s a home invasion film where a couple of killers (who indulge in a bit of rape on the side) are invited to a party by a group of rich people who they end up helping out of a spot of car trouble. Of course it turns nasty when they make fun of their eventual assailants and, much like another film starring David Hess, ‘The Last House on the Left’, the tables are turned by their victims. It does have a decent twist in the tale at the end, albeit a little convoluted and I’m not sure it really justifies the film itself which is pretty nasty at times. That said, Deodato knows how to shoot a film and as long as you can put up with the violence, which is sexual at times and not easy to take, then it’s on the better side of the 39 films on the original DPP list.

Needless to say it was the sexual violence that got this into trouble more than anything else and it was refused even a cinema certificate in the early 80s in the UK. It’s a sign of the unregulated times that Skyline managed to put out an uncut version on VHS in October 1982, less than a year later it was successfully prosecuted and banned in July 1983. It remained unavailable until VIPCO, rather pointlessly, release a version that was missing a ridiculous 11m43s, mainly from the strong rape scenes and moments of sexual violence, this was in 2002. Shameless did a lot better, missing 43 seconds which was pretty much exclusively reserved for razors being used suggestively and intimately up and down the female form. We may one day see an uncut version, if someone can be bothered to release it, but for now the version we have isn’t at all bad.

Current status: unavailable in the UK on Shameless DVD, cut by 43 seconds, available uncut on region free Code Red in the US.

Title: ‘I Spit on Your Grave’ (1981)

Director: Meir Zarchi
Uncut running time: 94 minutes
Alternative titles: ‘Day of the Woman’, ‘I Hate Your Guts’, ‘The Rape and Revenge of Jennifer Hill’


To describe this film as divisive would be an understatement with people calling it both feminist and exploitative of women in equal measure. There’s no right or wrong answer in that and I’m sure we all know the simple plot which is essentially a rape revenge film where the female victim turns the tables on her attackers. It’s monumentally brutal in its depiction of rape and incredibly difficult to watch, in fact you feel that you need to take a shower afterwards.

It’s clearly low budget and that grittiness just adds to the feeling of shock and Camille Keaton as Jennifer is astonishingly convincing. You are firmly on her side when she exacts her terrifying and brutal revenge and, from my perspective, you certainly aren’t invited to revel and enjoy the horrors that those ‘men’ inflict upon her. The writers and filmmakers make it easy for us by portraying the gang as one dimensional and pure evil, would it have been more challenging had we been given more characterisation? Their actions cause us to want to see them punished so there is a case for calling the filmmakers out for expecting us to revel and enjoy castration, decapitation and basic murder…even if it is an act of revenge. It’s a challenging film and one that asks a number of questions of the audience who, on first viewing (many may never watch it again), are likely to be too traumatised to want to think about.

The film landed itself in serious trouble with the BBFC after Wizard put out the uncut version in January 1982 and then again by Astra shortly after. By July 1983 it had been seized and successfully prosecuted, not seeing any further release until 2001 when it was brought out again on VHS by Screen Entertainment. More than seven minutes were removed, interestingly all from the rape scenes with none of the moments of revenge tinkered with.

In 2006 Screen Entertainment tried again with a version they claimed was uncut, before the BBFC removed 41 seconds. In reality what they had done is reframe some of the scenes in line with previous cuts. This had a very bizarre effect by diluting the rape scenes so much that the moments of revenge suddenly seemed a little over the top! Finally 101 Films put forward a genuinely uncut version in 2010 which suffered from 2m54s of cuts, again to the stronger elements of the rape scenes, entirely removing the rape over the rock and any exploitative emphasis that the rapists were enjoying it. I can’t see an uncut version ever being released in the UK

Current status: Available on DVD and blu-ray on 101 Films, cut by 2m54s in the UK, available uncut in the US on Anchor Bay.

Title: Island of Death (1972)

Director: Nico Mastorakis
Uncut running time: 108 minutes
Alternative title: ‘A Craving for Lust’, ‘Devils in Mykonos’, ‘Psychic Killer 2’, ‘Island of Perversion’, ‘Cruel Destination’


Hell’s Bells this is a seriously nasty film! A couple (Christopher and Celia) leave London, seemingly intent on ridding the island of Mykonos of anything they believe is perverse or unnatural and nothing is off the table. An artist is crucified and has paint poured down his throat, a policeman is hanged from his own plane, Christopher urinates on another woman before beating her half to death and decapitating her with a JCB…oh, and he also rapes a goat! It seems as if the filmmakers sole intention was to cram as much depravity and exploitatively violent scenes as possible into one film and pretty much succeeded. The twist in the tale is that the couple were brother and sister so the whole thing was driven by incestuous desires…of course it was!

All of the above may sound like a certain amount of fun but it really isn’t. It’s not particularly well made, save for a shot or two using a fish-eye lens involving a mysterious figure who haunts Celia’s dreams. Of course he turns out to be very real and is also a murderous rapist. If the intention was to make a purely exploitative film then it’s a resounding success!

The film was absolutely hammered by the BBFC who removed just over 13 minutes for its original cinema release (as ‘A Craving for Lust’) in 1976 before reverting back to its original title for an uncut VHS release by AVI. It was banned in November 1983 but, possibly due to confusion with a similarly titled Narcisco Ibanez Serrador film, was removed (but not released) from the list only to be reinstated in October 1985. It was refused a video certificate again under the name ‘Psychic Killer 2’ (it’s worth noting that this was a heavily cut version which shows the extreme nature of the material) before being released with 4m09s of cuts by VIPCO in the early 00s. Incredibly Arrow got it past the BBFC completely uncut in 2010 and it’s even been shown without cuts on the UK Horror Channel. How times have changed!

Current status: Uncut in the UK and US on Arrow Video.

Intruder (1989)

Tagline: ‘A new dimension in terror’
Running Time: 88 minutes (uncut version)

Film Quality: 4/5
Gore Content: 4/5
Entertainment Value: 4.5/5
Originality: 4/5

Introduction

Director Scott Spiegel was looking for a directorial project and rediscovered one of his early Super 8 movies filmed when he was a teenage called ‘Night Crew’. Realising that the horror genre was a relatively easy one within which low budget film makers could make a name for themselves and having already achieved success as a writer and producer in the ‘Evil Dead’ series, he gathered up some of the old gang to tread over familiar ground. With a great deal of unrealised talent within the cast and crew they produced one of the most overlooked and original slasher movies to grace the 80s and forever changed the landscape of cinema history.

In a nutshell

The owners of a small convenience store sell up and decide to close down, resulting in the night crew asked to stay behind to ‘slash prices’ in anticipation of a stock clearance. They get a slashing of a different kind as a maniacal killer is trapped inside with them, picking them off one by one. But who is he and will any of them get out alive?

What’s good about it?

By 1989 we thought we’d seen it all in the slasher genre but Scott Spiegel manages to bring something fresh and appealing to the table here. Many of the tropes are there (bunch of kids stalked by an unseen killer at night, all in one place) but there’s something a little more believable and commonplace about it. For a start they all have a reason for being in this ‘terrible place’ and a reason for splitting up…it’s their job and they are where they’re supposed to be. None of the teenagers are irritating or unlikeable, there’s no gratuitous nudity or sex, no forced moral message, no masked killer, legend or folk tale upon which to suspect that there is anything out of the ordinary. It’s just a regular nightshift where something extraordinary happens which gives it an everyday feel.

The kills, on the whole, are wonderfully over the top with lots of the red stuff. We have eyes gouged out on letter pins, heads splattered in hydraulic crushers and in the standout scene, a head cut in half from cheek to cheek (left). It’s presented in graphic close up and we see a lot of the aftermath as well with blood spurting off screen. For such a low budget film the effects really are quite remarkable and it’s no surprise that the make-up effects were provided by Greg Nicotero, Howard Berger and Robert Kurtzman who went on to become the world renowned KNB EFX crew. This was Nicotero’s first supervisory role and allowed him to set up KNB as a company, so this is where it all started!

There is a thick vein of very dark humour running throughout ‘Intruder’ and some wonderful dialogue, especially Dan Hicks’ tremendous twice told monologue about a fireman, ‘here comes f’cking Parker, walking down nine miles, swinging the head by the hair in one hand and his sandwich in the other’. Some of the visual gags as well are great, one of the kids is sawn in half and found dumped in a bin with a sign around his head that proudly claims to have ‘Half Off’. Once again, it raises the film above your average slasher by not taking itself too seriously but not sending itself up either. It’s a very fine line to walk and this film treads it almost perfectly.

The production crew proved to be highly resourceful, finding a genuine store that had actually closed down which they could use for virtually nothing and intercepting stock set for landfill to line the shelves. This film cost just $130,000 but looks superb in terms of production values and authenticity. It’s also got some decent acting chops, including Renee Estevez (Martin Sheen’s daughter), an ‘Evil Dead 2’ reunion for the brilliant Dan Hicks, Sam and Ted Raimi and a brief appearance by Bruce Campbell. Hicks in particular is having a ball in the limelight and turns in a wonderfully maniacal performance.

What about the bad?

Coming at the end of the slasher movie craze and WAY past its golden era it suffered horribly through bad timing. Never mind that it did something fresh and original with the format, people were tired of the genre so it fell by the wayside and has only very recently been reappraised and appreciated for the impressive film that it is. It’s also never been given the credit for launching a huge array of talent but more about that later.

Any themes?

‘Dawn of the Dead’ used its mall setting to make a comment on consumerism and whilst I don’t think there were many delusions of grandeur on the part of the filmmakers here I like the way that it places itself right in the middle of small town America in a minimart that’s closing down. At a time when small towns and businesses were being squeezed out by big business and huge supermarkets, here’s a story about the little guy fighting back. There’s a bit of a spoiler alert here but Hicks’ character Bill is being forced to sell up against his will by his former friends and majority stakeholder Danny. He put everything into that store and was being forced to watch it being torn apart brick by brick in the interests of money and development. It sends him over the edge and, as he so eloquently puts it “got a little carried away”’

His workforce are disposable, Danny doesn’t care about them, reflecting big business attitudes towards its own workforce…very relatable in today’s society. So whilst middle America was being left to fend to itself in the marketplace, so were Danny’s workforce, offered little protection against the relentless violence, or ‘power’, of the system.

Release history

One of the film’s major selling points, the notorious gore set pieces, were almost completely shorn by the MPAA which must have been absolutely gut wrenching for the FX teams involved. So much work had gone into creating some impressively gruesome effects that, initially, nobody got to see. The cuts were drastic and rendered some scenes almost nonsensical which certainly didn’t help the flow of the film. Add to that the fact that the killer’s identity, and ultimately the surprise ending, was revealed on the box art to many of the VHS tapes released…way to go!

In the UK, the full uncut version was submitted to the BBFC, needless to say it fared pretty poorly and seven seconds short of two minutes was hacked out of it to give us a version not too dissimilar to the US version. It was more complete, made more sense and, to be fair, it was still pretty gruesome. It also had a brightly coloured, yellow sticker on it emblazoned with the words ‘New Version’ but even in the pre-Internet days it was clear that something quite special was missing.

Thankfully, with the advent of blu-ray and the existence of a fabled ‘director’s cut’ containing untold gory treasures, it enjoyed a serious resurgence in the days of the shiny disc. Both the UK and US now have wonderfully restored versions available and in the US, a limited release of a workprint version which contains EVEN MORE GORE with some of the scenes extended, though not remastered and without sound. These extended scenes are available as special features within the standard releases.

Cultural Impact

I wasn’t kidding when I said it launched some major talent. We’ve already touched on the advent of Greg Nicotero’s KNB FX company and Sam Raimi going on to direct Hollywood blockbusters but they weren’t the only ones.

Renee Estevez (left, in a neat little in-joke camera trick!) went on to appear in 44 episodes of ‘The West Wing’, Craig Stark has continued to act to this day and most recently appeared in Tarantino’s ‘The Hateful Eight’, Burr Steer has turned to directing including the reasonably successful ‘Pride and Prejudice and Zombies’ whilst cinematographer Fernando Arguelles has had a prolific career in movies and TV with credits including ‘Grimm’, ‘Prison Break’, ‘Hemlock Grove’ and ‘Breakout Kings’.

But most notably writer and director Scott Spiegel introduced co-writer Lawrence Bender to an enthusiastic movie geek by the name of Quentin Tarantino. The two collaborated on a little independent feature called ‘Reservoir Dogs’, produced by Bender, and forever changed the history of film. Bender’s CV is just incredible, including executive producer of the recent Oscar winning ‘Hacksaw Ridge’ and the announced third instalment of ‘Kill Bill, not to mention his frequent collaborations with Tarantino that ended with ‘Inglorious Basterds’.

There was a huge amount of talent working on this film that it’s no surprise it stands out from the crowd and it’s great to see so many of the crew breaking out and making a success of themselves.

Our resourceful 'final girl' surrounded by carnage

Final Thoughts

A very smart, witty and gruesome slasher that was cruelly overlooked at the time but seems to have secured a new lease of life on blu-ray and re-appreciation. It comes across as unique and unusual and the fact that so many of the crew came out of it and have established themselves as leaders in their field shows that the film comes from good stock. I have a lot of time for this film and always thoroughly enjoy watching it…if you think you’ve seen it all within the slasher movie genre then give this a go, it’s fresh, original and a blast!

Memorable quotes:

Bill: “I’m jus’ crazy ‘bout this store.”

Bub: “If my brother hadn’t hit him repeatedly with a blender, he would’ve killed me.”
Linda: “A blender?”
Bub: “Yeah…a Hamilton Beach Blender.”

Bill: “Here comes f@cking Parker, walking down nine miles, swinging the goddamn head by the hair in one hand and his sandwich in the other…”

You’ll like this if you enjoyed…

‘Stagefright’, ‘April Fool’s Day’, ‘Scream’

Five of the Best: Festive Frights!

Christmas is for kids, right? A time for families to get together, eat and drink too much, give each other presents and catch an opportunistically romantic moment underneath the mistletoe? There’s no place for horror, scares and general terror is there? Well, yes! As recently as the 16th Century Christmas was banned by Puritans who associated it with excess and mischief, long before Charles Dickens and his contemporaries placed the emphasis back on religion and reciprocal appreciation, in no small part thanks to ‘A Christmas Carol’, perhaps one of the most famous ghost stories of all!

Christmas brings with it a great sense of mysticism. Just think of flying reindeer, elves, Santa and otherworldly, magical creatures who deliver gifts to all of the good little boys and girls that vary depending on country and culture. If you reward the good then there’s some mileage to be gained for punishing the wicked! With religious imagery and ‘the true meaning of Christmas’ focusing on the birth of the Son of God, ghost stories have become a seasonal tradition. In the UK, during the 70s, the BBC launched an annual ‘A Ghost Story for Christmas’, resurrected in 2005. We love a good scare with a mince pie so perhaps it’s time to delve into the archives and take a look at some of those scary stories that have been captured on film with my ‘Five of the Best Christmas Horror Films’. As always, let me know what you think and please…give us the gift of your suggestions. We’d appreciate it a lot more than another Christmas Card!

‘Gremlins’ (1984)

Dir: Joe Dante

Who said family orientated Christmas films had to be saccharine? Set in a chocolate box small town, straight out of ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’, Dante instead constructs a wonderful subversion by turning this small town upside down in true fairy style fashion. In a quite brilliant twist on traditional children’s stories, the deadline of midnight is broken to turn the cutesy Mogwai into fatally mischievous Gremlins, turning the idyllic Kingston Falls into a whole new ‘Pottersville’. Set against winter wonderland scenery and festively illustrated backdrops that come alive from a thousand Christmas cards, it’s an unmistakably malevolent satire on the greed of Western cultural excesses, our rejection of mysticism and its subsequent loss of meaning…which is of course what Christmas is all about!

Most anti-festive feature? It’s got to be Phoebe Cates’ memorable and dark as Santa’s boots speech about why she doesn’t celebrate Christmas. This is ostensibly a comedy horror and yes, people do die, but there is humour in the proceedings with the Gremlins generally portrayed as childlike and purely intent on causing mayhem rather than deliberately kill and maim. That the film pauses for this intense and upsetting personal moment is breathtaking and hits you like a bolt from the blue. Other than Quint’s Indianapolis speech in ‘Jaws’ I struggle to think of a more effective monologue as a form of tragic storytelling than this moment…that it serves almost purely to prove that Santa doesn’t exist only complements the subversive nature of Dante’s incredible film.

Click here for full review

Black Christmas (1974)

Dir: Bob Clark

Coming a full four years before John Carpenter’s ‘Halloween’ (Carpenter original suggested his classic as a sequel to Clark’s neglected gem), ‘Black Christmas’ serves as the outline for Carpenter’s slasher blueprint. Set in a sorority house in the run up to the Christmas holidays, an unseen killer begins to stalk and slash the young girls in the building. We have long camera shots from the killer’s point of view, we have the terrorisation of female victims, a final girl, terrible place and a calendar date on which to hang the film. It’s all there and Clark delivers a supremely disturbing and chilling film where the killer is not only unseen but also completely unknown, giving us no initial warning, no backstory and no resolution at the film’s macabre climax. The phone calls to the women in particular are genuinely frightening with the killer putting on a terrifyingly threatening oral display that is as obscene as it is scary.

Most anti-festive feature? The murder of Barb. The ghost of slashers yet to come have since conditioned us to know things won’t end well for Barb who drinks, is sexually promiscuous and openly taunts the killer. That she is murdered by a glass unicorn (a symbol of purity, implying that the killer is ‘curing’ Barb of her infidelities) whilst Carol singers perform ‘O Come all ye Faithful’, their cherubic cheer drowning out the sound of Barb’s death throws. It’s a quite stunning scene, powerful in its execution and poignant in its depiction.

Click here for full review

‘Silent Night, Deadly Night’ (1984)

Dir: Charles E. Sellier Jr

Not as well executed as Clark’s chiller, this remains a fairly interesting slasher film, different in that it focuses on the killer rather than the victims he stalks. By portraying him as the victim from the start it gives the film a unique feel as we have some sympathy for him, after all, he witnesses his parents murdered by Santa Claus which is something nobody needs to see! The film got itself into a certain amount of trouble, mainly from self-appointed moral guardians who thought children would be traumatised at the thought of a killer Santa, because of course, children are the film’s target audience…although to be fair they were asking for trouble advertising the film during ‘The Little House on the Prairie’!!! As a consequence the film was withdrawn in the US following demonstrations and protests from the Parent-Teacher’s Association and was pulled from any kind of release in the UK…so much for Christmas spirit!

Most anti-festive feature? Take your pick!!! Let’s not forget that the opening scenes show a mother and father killed by a man dressed as Santa right in front of their kids, both of whom end up in an oppressive orphanage where they’re routinely beaten, one such incident shown happening during Christmas three years later. There’s a terrifying scene early on where young Billy’s grandfather launches into an insane ramble about how Santa punishes the wicked…no wonder he’s mentally scarred. And then Billy eventually snaps, going on a murderous rampage dressed as Santa waving an axe around whilst using Deer antlers and Christmas lights as makeshift weapons screaming ‘Naughty’ at the top of his voice. This certainly isn’t ‘Earnest Saves Christmas’!

‘The League of Gentleman’s Christmas Special’ (2000)

Dir: Steve Bendelack

Strictly speaking this is less a film and more an hour long special but, it’s so cinematic in its portrayal whilst referencing numerous horror films that I’m going to cut it some slack. Broadcast in the UK on December 27th 2000, this special has become something of a cult classic and is, quite frankly terrifying at times. Taking the form of an anthology with a wraparound story that shows Royston Vasey Vicar Bernice struggling to come to terms with a traumatic childhood event involving her parents being abducted by a maniac dressed as Santa. The first story centres around a voodoo ritual as an act of revenge, whilst the third is set in Victorian times with a cursed veterinarian but it’s the middle story that steals the show. Set in the German town of Duisberg it is a breathtakingly frightening and funny take on the vampire legend. In our house it isn’t Christmas until The League of Gentleman tells us it is!

Most anti-festive feature? The climax, it’s a classic League moment of total darkness that belies their comedy leanings. Having reconciled her past thanks to the tales of her three visitors, the cynical Bernice, for the first time since her parents’ abduction, embraces the Christmas spirit. But when a fourth figure appears at her door saying “Your all grown up”, wearing a Santa outfit, grotesque features and a maniacal laugh, she realises that the evil that took her innocence all those years ago is back to finish the job. As bleak an ending to anything, let alone a Christmas special, as you’re ever likely to see, it’s the League’s finest hour.

Click here for full review

Tales from the Crypt (1972)

Dir: Freddie Francis

From one anthology featuring a wraparound Christmas story to another featuring a single festive fright. Before its unavoidable association with the Cryptkeeper, Amicus adapted five ‘Tales from the Crypt’ and ‘Vault of Horror’ episodes for a big screen outing, the first of which featured Joan Collins as a murderous maiden, killing her husband on Christmas Eve. Shortly afterwards a bulletin interrupts a carol rendition of ‘Oh Come all ye Faithful’ (what is it about that carol? It features heavily in key scenes in ‘Black Christmas’ and ‘League of Gentleman’ above) to reveal that there is an escaped lunatic on the loose dressed as Santa…and he’s wanting to stir all through Joan’s house! But she can’t call the police because of the small matter of a dead husband in the front room and red bloodstains all over her beautiful white rug! Of course there is a point to the wraparound story (a mysterious man telling them how they’re going to die) and there’s a big clue to the twist, notably that Collins’ character is already wearing the brooch that her husband gave her for Christmas in the story.

Most anti-festive feature? The fact that the daughter gleefully lets in the deranged Santa believing him to be the real thing, thus inviting the death of her mother. It’s a great little twist on the hypocrisy that we all perpetuate by telling our children not to talk to strangers before placing them on the knee of a total stranger in disguise. Tell them that they’re safe in their bed at night, yet our houses are so secure that Santa can come and go as he pleases. Also, a great use of Christmassy colour portrayed by the husband’s bright red blood all over that glorious white rug!

Honourable mention?

I must admit that I enjoyed the 2015 ‘Krampus’ which was a fine recounting of the anti-Christmas legend, until the end at least. It very nearly captured the same anarchic spirit as ‘Gremlins’!

So now it’s over to you, let us know your favourite festive frights…